Sunday, January 25, 2009

I Just Feel Depressed

That's it! And my family doesn't get it.
Well they get it, but they think I'm silly
because it's over the internet and board issues.
Like internet friends aren't real friends.
And I value every friend I have, internet or not.

I've been to the point of tears the last few days because
an online friend I cherish left a board I'm on because of
drama that happened there.
Another left also that I was becoming close to,
that was a neat connection because she's from a town close to me.

Now other decisions are being made there that I also don't agree with.
I've done so much there that I almost feel like this board belongs to me.
But I need to pull myself back and remember it's not my board,
I just help run it.

I feel depressed every time I click into there to check on things.
I feel like people are being manipulated into doing what others want.
I feel like I'm being left out.
I feel like I really don't want to post.
I feel like an idiot feeling like this.
I feel like I don't fit there anymore.
I feel like I'll lose some great friends if I stop going there.
I feel like I'll explode and tell someone off if I stay.
I feel like crying again.
I feel like nobody gives a shit.
I feel like that board "is" a huge part of my life.
I feel like that board "was" a huge part of my life.
I feel like crawling in bed and never getting up.
I feel like I hate everything right now.
I feel tears running down my cheeks.
I feel like such a loser.

6 comments:

Katy said...

Oh Kristine...I am so sorry for whatever is going on right now. I agree...friends are friends...no matter what! I am sorry that things are hurting you right now. I have prayed for you and I hope everything turns out OK! xoxo

Cathy said...

Thinking of you sweetie!!! Hoping things calm down for you! Sorry I haven't been around very much to the board. I just haven't had much computer time here lately.... It's always something the kids need!

Another Mom on the Internet said...

I consider you a friend and we're a zillion miles apart. {{HUGS}}

I hope things work out, I've been a lurker lately.

I'm here if you want to chat to someone on the outside of the drama.

Kristine said...

Thank you all you're so sweet.
I'm just on an emotional roller coaster lately. I'm sure everything will work out just fine. HUGS

Miranda said...

Aww, I'm sorry you're feeling down. You can email me anytime you want to chat or vent :) Hope everything settles down soon.

Kerri said...

You are a friend to me for sure! My days are not the same when we don't chat! LOL. I wouldn't know what to do without you!
I'm here for you always!
HUGS!!!